5 “chaos merchants” who make every game dramatic

Last Updated on 27 November 2025

Football has artists, architects, and assassins… and then it has agents of chaos. The players who turn every match into a rollercoaster you didn’t consent to but absolutely cannot stop watching.

These aren’t necessarily the best players in the league, nor the most consistent, but they are unquestionably the most chaotic.

One moment they’re producing genius, the next they’re committing crimes against footballing peace, and that unpredictability is exactly why fans adore – or despise – them.

5 – Cristian Romero (Tottenham Hotspur)

A defender should never be on a list of chaos merchants. However, Tottenham Hotspur’s Cristian Romero fits the bill almost to perfection.

In the same mould as Sergio Ramos, you can never rule out a moment of madness in a game involving Romero. You can almost be certain that Romero will make himself known and if you are a Spurs fan, you want it to be for something positive.

Unfortunately, it’s usually negative, given how Romero has more red cards (4) than any other player in the Premier League since joining Spurs.

4 – Richarlison (Tottenham Hotspur)

Another Tottenham player that makes the list is Richarlison and it can be for a number of things. From providing enough needle to disrupt the opposition to losing his own head after missing a chance, Richarlison is chaos personified.

That might be one of the major reasons why he is not the most consistent striker in the Premier League. As per Transfermarkt, given his amount of talent, it’s hard to imagine he’s never even hit close to 20 goals in one season.

But if channeled positively, Richarlison can be heavily influential. The key is balance and that is one of Thomas Frank’s biggest challenges as manager of Tottenham.

3 – Darwin Nunez (Al Hilal)

Chaos goes hand in hand with Uruguay striker and former Liverpool star, Darwin Nunez. He may not be the best striker, even when on-form, but you could bet your house for some entertainment, every time he plays.

In fact, it got to a point where Jurgen Klopp and Arne Slot would bring Nunez on just to instill some energy up-top. Funnily enough it did work on a few occasions with the Uruguayan scoring a brace for 10-men Liverpool, away at St. James Park.

2 – Andre Onana (Manchester United – On loan to Trabzonspor)

If it is bad to be on this list as a defender, it might be considered a sin to be even close to a chaos merchant list…as a goalkeeper.

Andre Onana, however, could easily be number one on this list. There is a 12-minute compilation of all mistakes Onana made during his time at United.

Prone to making errors, loud in his interviews and rarely backing it with solid performances, it’s hard not to put him on this list.

At the same time, the Cameroonian can also pull off remarkable saves, too. But, never quite instills confidence in a defense, becoming one of the very few chaotic goalkeepers.

1 – Bruno Fernandes (Manchester United)

Bruno Fernandes plays a brand of football which was very common in the 2000s. In the current era of systems and big-brain tactics, a player like Bruno is an anomaly.

Unlike most of the other names on this list, Bruno is a good chaos merchant. That’s because he influences games more positively than others.

He can come up with moments of madness, for example cross the ball with his first touch from an awkward height when he could take another touch. But then Harry Maguire would be offside and would not be able to score that winner at Anfield.

The only downside to Bruno’s fantastic style of play is that he often feels like he has to do everything. But most of the time, it turns out well, so fair play to the Portuguese star.